"This ground is efficacious for Husbandry"

My journey in yet becoming the wife that God designed me to be for the husband He designed for me. (It wasn't a smooth ride ya'll!)

cul·ti·vate

/ˈkəltəˌvāt/

verb

verb: cultivate; 3rd person present: cultivates; past tense: cultivated; past participle: cultivated; gerund or present participle: cultivating

1. 1. prepare and use (land) for crops or gardening. "the peasants who cultivated the land became its owners" Similar: till plow dig turn hoe farm work prepare fertilize mulch

• break up (soil) in preparation for sowing or planting. "damp, well-cultivated soil"

• raise or grow (plants), especially on a large scale for commercial purposes. "they were encouraged to cultivate basic food crops" Similar: grow raise rear bring on tend plant sow

• BIOLOGY grow or maintain (living cells or tissue) in culture. "blood cells that can be most easily cultivated are macrophages"

1. 2. try to acquire or develop (a quality, sentiment, or skill). "he cultivated an air of indifference" Similar: try to acquire pursue court try to develop work hard at foster nurture encourage

• try to win the friendship or favor of (someone). "it helps if you go out of your way to cultivate the local people" Similar: seek the friendship of seek the favor of try to win over woo court pay court to rub up the right way run after make advances to make up to keep sweet ingratiate oneself with curry favor with associate with mix with keep company with
  

• apply oneself to improving or developing (one's mind or manners). Similar: improve better refine elevate polish educate train develop enlighten enrich civilize culture

Origin

late 16th century: from medieval Latin cultivat- ‘prepared for crops’, from the verb cultivare, from cultiva (terra) ‘arable (land)’, from colere ‘cultivate, inhabit’.

Not only does a husband cultivate the land, the land has to be pliable and fertile. Not just in reproduction but spirit.

Learning that a husband is a gardner in spirit and truth.

How are you preparing your soil/soul for planting?

Whew chile! This revelation was so deep and so heavy when God allowed Holy Spirit to reveal it to me. My husband and I started to binge watch Star Trek...the William Shatner version. On one episode Captain Kirk and Spock arrived at a beautiful planet. When it was safe to deboard the vessle, Spock walked around the grounds. He rattled off the beauty of the planet but he kept inspecting. He bent down and put his hands in the dirt. He felt the temperature of the dirt and then rattled off the correct temperature that would sprout vegetation of whatever was planted. He made the statement "This ground is efficacious for husbandry." Excuse me Sir?!?! I had to pause the episode. I sat there in astonishment. The "AHA!" moment that came from a Star Trek episode caused me to study the true meaning of Gen 1: 11-13 and Gen 2:15. When God spoke to the Earth and told her to grow vegetation, plants and trees with seeds of its own kind, He penetrated the Earth with His words that are filled with seed which is life. Not only that, her atmosphere was primed to allow this planting and sprouting to take place. When God placed Adam in Eden and told him to work the land and take dominion over the beast of the Earth, Adam was meant to cultivate and encourage the grounds to perfom the command that it was created to do. It. Was. The. Blueprint. For. Marriage. Two working together to produce what God gave authority and power to bring forth. What an honor! So how come it took me two marriages and two divorces to figure this out? I'll tell ya...

I've been married twice...

Yes I have been married twice and divorced twice. My first marriage was not ordained by God. There are a few reasons why I got married. I didn't think anyone would ask me, it was a way to get out from under my parents and lastly I loved him (in that order). Notice I said nothing about praying to God or asking Him what He wanted and desired concerning the outcome of this union. I did not know who it was then because I catergorized it as my "gut" but it was God telling me "Do not marry him." I did it anyway because I was 18 and grown (girl bye). It was not a marriage filled with love. There were some good times but I left that marriage with a lot of pain and hurt and a baby that I creamated because he was born stillborn. Jay'ven Bernard Rodgers would have been 19 years old had he lived. His father was a Sailor. We were stationed overseas. After his time was done at his first duty stationed we PCS (permanent change of duty station) back to the states. 6 months later, we were in the process of getting a divorce. Fast forward to 8 years later I met my second husband while I served in the Army. We dated, deployed to Afghanistan, got married while on R&R (rest and recuperation leave) and divorced. Both marriages barely made it to 3 years. Both marriages God told me not to do it. My second husband TOLD me he was not ready. I thought he was lying but it did not matter because I was so adamantly positive that MY love could change him. In retrospect I married my second husband to make up for my first husband and I just knew God was with me in both of them. Mmmmmmmmmm...no. I mean He was because He takes care of children and fools but you can tell the difference between a marriage orchestrated by God and a marriage orchestrated by man. One is fruitful and the other is full of thorns. I digress. Because of the trauma of my first marriage, I tried my hardest to control my marriage to my second husband so that it would be better. That really did not matter because the evidence of my second husband not being ready revealed itself through acts of infideltiy. As a result my bitternes, anger and frustration revealed itself in the act of infidelity (I told you all...this was a place for honesty). Oh honey it was some true blue and tight like glue toxicity going on. How could I have expected anything more? He was Muslim and I was "Christian" (the air quotes symbolize the loose and lukewarm nature of my Christianity). We never badgered each other because of their belief. We would have conversations on the difference and similarities and that would be the extent of it. I loved my second husband from a different place, allbeit broken but different. One thing I did do even in my sin was pray for him. Even if it was as simple as "Lord touch his heart", I prayed. It hurt worse than the first divorce. After all my temper tantrums, being upset, venting on social media, trashing how terrible of a husband he was, I had to take accountability for my part in the dissolution.

1. I shouldn't have been trying get married before healing.

2. He TOLD me he wasn't ready.

3. I didn't ask God ANYTHING!

4. We were absolutely unevenly yoked.

5. I didn't study any information or ask for information about past relationships.

BUT I STILL HAD TO PRAY FOR HIM! As for the divorce and what caused it, I did it to myself and by myself. Of course the actions of my ex-husband played a part but had I not been stubborn, prideful and egostiistical and used discernment, we could have avoided all of that. It took some work to get through. It took therapy, prayer, self-reflection, accountability, responsibility and Holy Spirit to reveal myself to myself. And I took every single word and rod of correction that was given. I tried dating after our divorce and it did not work. I still loved him. I had vowed to myself that I wouldn't answer texts or phone calls. He didn't deserve a vowel or constanant! Yet I still had to pray for him. One day he called me. I rolled my eyes at the phone. I rolled them so hard I almost got a headache! God said to me, "Answer it." I told God I didn't want to answer it and asked why should I? God said, "Ashli, answer it." I did. That was one of the most honest conversations that we had. I still had to pray for him. That conversation turned into daily calls and texts. He called when he said he would. He would let me know where he was and when he would be home. The foundation of friend was being laid. The year that we spent apart allowed alot of room for growth and reflection. Even though I was in California and he was in Texas, he put in work to re-establish trust. I made it clear that if he wanted me, he'd have to move to Cali. I did not want to come back to Texas where the problems existed. Him moving out west was a chance for something new, fresh and pure. He moved and we reconciled.

The Breakthrough

If I could talk to Hosea...whew chile!

Read the entire book of Hosea.

Yes. We got back together. Things were completely different. God was perfecting our love and understanding for each other. Moreover, we had more and more conversations about God. Not religion, God. He had questions that needed answers. If you are wondering, yes I was still praying. I prayed for this man for a total of 7 years. Until one evening in early 2018 at an evening worship service where a prophet of the Most High God repeated to my then boyfriend every single thought and concern that he had spoke to me in private. Let me be clear, I had never heard of this preacher before nor had I seen him before. When the word of the Lord came through this man I fell to the floor on my knees and gave God glory for moving on my boyfriend's behalf. In 2018 my ex-husband turned boyfriend became my fiance shortly afterwards. He denounced Islam and accepted Jesus as his savior and proclaimed Adonai to be the one true God. We got married in 2019 and he got baptized. He has been on fire for God every since. So what was the problem?

Prepare for what you pray for!

My husband and I both knew that this time around in our second marriage that it was different. God was not just in the center of our marriage but He surrounded it. We even put a third chair out to invite the Holy Spirit to sit in with us as the mediator if we were faced with a disagreement. The love, care and concern that we had was because we understood that each person was a child of God FIRST! You cannot treat a child of God any kind of way. Period! We also grew to understand that laying down our lives for the other is exactly what Christ did on the cross. Now if you've read the blogs before this one, you know by now that I have worked in a gamut of industries to include the military. At no time did I ever consider to not work. I just knew that my husband and I would be a "power couple". The goal was to leave a legacy behind for our children and their children and so on-so forth. The hope was to do this while working our respective occupations and together as a married couple. You can insert seven laughs here.

If I was not able to work, I thought being a student was safe. However, at the same time I was learning the technical side of theater, film and television, God was revealing His mysteries to me that required the same amount of study if not more. There were a few semsters where God asked me to sit with HIm. I was obedient and spent time with the Father. The two classes that God allowed me to have full participation in was Biology ( that's another blog) and Crtitical Thinking-Semiotic Analysis (that too is another blog). I got so close to graduating and transferring to UCR. The last semester that would help me reach that goal, God told me to withdraw from my classes. Sir or Ma'am, I have never in my life had to learn what the true meaning of obedience was until I had to release from my hands and heart a thing that I thought would bring great joy and success. Then the direction was to come completely out of the program and learn how to be what I prayed for. I prayed for God to shape and mold me to be the wife He created me to be. I asked Him to transform our marriage into what He intended and biblically designed it to be. Whew! I. Was. Not. Ready.

Ephesians 5: 22-33

"Husband's love your wife as Christ loves the church..." We've heard that bible verse a plethora of times. It kept popping up in my spirit. I prayed about it and sat down to think...okay, what IS the purpse of the church? What type of structure is the church? Who is allowed in the church? Then I thought about these women,

1. Sarah was inside the tent when Abraham told her to bake bread from the best flour for God and his angles. (Gen 18: 1-15)

2. Zipporah acted quickly to protect Moses from the anger of God with blood. (Exo 4: 22-26)

3. Abigail rushed with offerings to prevent the killing of her husband Nabal's household, because of his corrupt practices with King David. (1 Sam 25: 20-31)

4. Esther prepared herself and was willing to face death to save her people from an evil man in the King's council, at the direction of Mordecai. (Esther)
   

All these women performed a service. They performed selfless service. They protected the atmosphere, lands and nations of people. Most impoartantly, they protected their husbands. They ushered in mercy and God's presence in ways that were powerful enough to shift paradigms. That. Is. The. Chruch. What is inside the tabernacle are 7 pieces of of furniture that allow the spirit of the Lord to dwell in the tent. When the spirit of the Lord came down, He gave instructions to the priest to instruct the poeple that depend on the information to thrive and survive and allow earth to be as it is in heaven. The atmosphere was prepared for such information. The best was presented for God to partake and be pleased. Life was sustained. The nations around the tabernacle or church were kept in alignment with the will of God. It explained everything that was concerning the tabernacle and it explained the importance of the Priest being hand selected by God to enter and have authority and the importance of a man being led to his wife. An image was presentd to me and I compared the direction and the process the Priest goes through to usher in God to the process of a man and woman consumating to create a child. It's the same thing. The uterus is the holy of holies where life (sperm) can enter into the soil and plant iteself to produce life. Life plus life equals life. If your mine is blown, imagine how mine was when Adonai revealed this to me! It made me sad. It mad me sad because had this information come from the church, marriage would be honored a lot more. It also made me sad because sex was used as self worship and not worship for the Lord...at least in my case. Sex within a marriage is beautiful, spiritual and binding.

Now that I know...

I know my purpose. I know that being a wife in a God ordained marriage is the most important mantle and job that I can have. It is my first ministry. I sometimes wish that I had witnessed this foundation as a youth. In order to grow and be used by God using the excuse of "I never saw it growing up" was not going to help. I also now understand that being the blueprint for a legacy is absolutely a thing when it comes to the Lord being in control. Being a woman seeking liberation in the world by the world's standards is unnecessary when we are already liberated by God.

Being a wife takes a specific type of anointing and my prayer is that women do not weaponize this gifting against women whom are single and waiting. I hear and see that a lot of women want to be a Proverbs 31 woman, without realizing that Sis worked! Sis was selfless for her husband, children and community. She worked throughout the day and honored her husband and household to the point where the elders of the city sung her praises. After God, she is her husband's nearest and trusted council. His heart is safe with her. She is protected and cultivated by him. She is his land of fruit, that if cultivated and watered correctly she will produce nothing but the best of life sustaining of fruit. Just as the Sun does the work of the day and the Moon does the work of the night, they work together to make sure the atmosphere operates as God intended...on one accord.

What revelation and realization have you recieved?